Grottesco; grotesque

Very often, we will always think back on those times when we missed the most.

I've been comparing the differences in my life at various moments. And somehow, the most memorable moment was when she was still part of my life. She has been the best person I've ever met. Despite me, being quite a failure, she gave me lots of chances and unbelievable patience. Where else could I ever find such a person other than my parents?

This is one of the thing that still makes me feel the pain. The only thing I can be happy about is that we are still friends. Unlike many others, when they can't be friends any longer.

The moment that I feel like going through again was when I was in Deyi Military Band. The sense of achievement and pride we attained can't be described with words. You have to be part of it to understand how it feels.

Another moment which I want to go through again was those times I worked with my Poly classmates. Days in Singapore Expo Hall and Timberland sales. It wasn't like working at all with them around.

It would goes on if I continue all those moments that I would want to relive. But come to think of it, there won't be any more chance for me to go back to those moments. In 5 months time, I'll reach the age of 21, when responsibility gets heavier. Decision can no longer be revolving around me; but also people around me.

That's how fast time flies in National Service. I've been 8 months in service!

I've finally seen the true ugly side of human. When one gets really self-centered and selfish. Basic instinct kicks in and brutal actions and verbal attacks occurs. It somehow ignite the anger in the surrounding affected personnel,making the anger starts to snowball. And as the anger snowballed,a chain reaction also takes place. More obvious selfishness and barbaric arts comes into the whole picture.

Ugly people, ugly world!

Recently, life was so mundane. Nothing exciting happened. The only thing that consoled me was the fact that the sky in Singapore is actually quite nice. Being in the sea in late nights were boring. If not for the fact that the stars are so mesmerizing, the moon shining so brightly, the late nights will be quite unbearable.

Furthermore, being confined through the weekend. There are so many pros and cons. It was then, that I actually had more sleep than any other weekend ever since I enlisted. Rest and sleep are no longer entitlement. They became privileges.

It is always all these that makes one mature and gradually, know what they want. I used to think that doing something tough is called "PRIDE". However, think on the other hand, pride is worthless in life. It does not makes you live longer. In fact, it might cause your life to be shortened. It is so not worth it to get yourself injured while serving the nation for 2 years. Injuries are for lifetime. Serving Nation is for war and disrupted times. But getting injured in these 2 years, how are we going to serve the nation again?

Anyway, time gets really bored recently. I should start looking for entertainment already...

I've no idea why I'm back here to blog, but somehow I can't log into wordpress. Anyway, time without training pass as fast as time in camp. I'm only left with that few days to play, and having not a single idea where i'll be posted to.

I've been so bored to the extent that I make myself even more bored.

anyway, I've so much to blog about. But I've no mood to blog, but only got the mood to talk to people. Any bored personnel can call me if he/she wants!

gotta run!

it seems that having too much time is actually harmful. It makes me think a lot. And thank GOD, I'm left with 22 more days.

Thinking of moving...

www.redembergreen.wordpress.com

relink if you want,

you may also leave it...Might pop back to blogger once in a while...

Somehow, the urge of finding someone to chat with comes out so suddenly. I’ve never had such feeling for the past few months. And I’ve realized. There’re not much people whom I can actually conduct a heart-to-heart conversation.

I wasn’t saying that most of my friends are not worthy friends whom I can’t voice to. But sometimes, having heart-to-heart conversation, it actually requires certain chemistry. It is like when you are craving for certain food. Upon seeing other foods in front of you, there’s simply no urge to lay your fingers on them.

And I’ve seen no one whom I can actually talk to now. Perhaps, there is. But I’ve overlooked them.

However, there is something worth saying. The sense of loneliness is no longer there. But the emptiness is still there though.

And I’m still seeking for companion!!!

Urgently!!!

Entering another phase of life in like 26 days, it isn’t just like entering Primary School from kindergarden, or into secondary school from primary school. The kind of feeling that overwhelmed me is just so amazing. It is just like how they write in the book, “The lion, the witch and the wardrobe.” Kind of similar to entering NARNIA!

The 2 years of National Service may seem so long, yet so short. But what else can be long, after going through more than 13years of education. And there might be 4 more years of education awaiting me after these 2years.

However, in these 2 years time, I’ve to start making major decision that will definitely affect my life. All these major decisions somehow were being wrapped into my secondary objectives. All in my mind now is to enjoy my 2 years of National Service.

So let’s come back to the waiting period for National Service. I’m once again, facing a driving practical test. This time round, is totally different from the 2 previous times. I’ve not a single urge to pass the driving test. Just treating it like a leisure test before enlisting.